One Sided Love
by HoshiToTsuki
Summary: I loved him so much, for so long.... But no matter how obvious  was, he never returned the feelings. And it's so, so sad... when you realize that th person you ended up with, who loves you so much, was your second choice.


**One Sided Love**

**HoshiToTsuki **

_**Reading is so good, if you review**_

I never would have thought that the worst thing that could possibly happen to you was falling in love. Maybe, before I met him, I thought it was failing school. Or maybe being robbed of all your possessions, or being kidnapped, or raped, or killed. But I guess I was wrong, and that falling in love _is _the worst thing that could possibly happen to you.

Unless, that is, the person loves you back. In my case, though, he didn't. I used to cry about that, become upset, angry, jealous even. I used to wish that she would be out of our lives forever, and think I was a horrible person for thinking it. But I guess that my thoughts weren't so terrible, seeing as, she had tried to kill me seven times, and drag him to Hell with her twice.

He was prepared to leap into Hell after his beloved if need be, and he still probably is. I wouldn't know, though, I haven't seen him in five years. And since that time a lot of things have happened. I never left this place again, after the well was demolished and I could never get home. My family probably thought I was dead when I didn't come home for a year, or that I had abandoned them or something. I don't think the tears they may have shed were tears that I deserved to have fallen at my sake.

The truth is, we could have rebuilt the well. I just thought, maybe, if I didn't ask him to help me rebuild it, I may grow closer to him in the time that would have otherwise been spent in my era. It didn't work, though, and now we're just farther apart.

Because he chose her, I'm now with someone I don't even love. I wish that I loved him, I really do. I just don't, because, well because he's not what I imagined. Don't get me wrong, he's kind, strong, loves me more than anything, a good husband and father, watches over his people with great care and fondness. He's handsome, intelligent, and protects me and the children with his life. But he's not who I've longed to be with forever.

It's as if I settled for second best, or even third. Because if I'd have been with anyone, and they'd have no problem, and love me as much as I loved them, it would have been him. But no matter how hard I tried to make him see (without throwing myself at him), he just couldn't. I wish he could have seen, I wish he could have opened his beautiful eyes and seen my feelings for him. I wish that my feelings could have been reflected in his eyes.

I guess the mirroring eyes were in the fun house, and because there was another person thrown in the mix, my eyes hit his, and his hers, but hers reflected back to his, and I was left alone. Alone, waiting for someone to come along and shatter me. I was shattered already when he chose her, even if I did understand his decision, even if I was a bit jealous.

It was a one sided love story, all the way. He (my new husband) loved me, I loved the other, and the other loved… another. That other didn't even return his feelings, really. Or at least, she put them out of her way during her second chance at life.

And as my children run into our small home beneath the falls, bearing arm loads of flowers for me, I laugh at their innocence, but waves of guilt wash over me. One child is four, her name is Hana, and she is very pretty, with my dark hair and his blue eyes. The other is a two year old named Akira, he is our son, and resembles his sister and both of us.

They laugh and smile and hold their bundles up to me, and I offer them sad smiles, which they are both to young to realize. I bend down on one knee, pulling them both close and hugging them with whispered thank you. It hurt me so much when this happens, when they come in as I am thinking my own selfish thoughts. When I visualize the life I may have led instead of the one I lead now.

I hope that my children will never know that their father was my second choice, that… they may have been my second choice. This whole life, their 'brother' and 'sister' wolves would be traded in a moment if I had the chance.

As he walks into our humble dwelling, carrying fresh meet over one of his shoulders, he grins at our happy family scene. But I see his keen nose pick up my scent, and he realizes my grief. He may not know the cause, but there is no surpassing a demon's sense of smell.

He lays his kill on the few boards that serve as our table, and comes to me, wrapping strong, safe arms around my shoulders and holding me close. He whispers his greeting, and asks how I'm doing.

I nod, and reply fine in a low voice, then, as not to worry the children he turns to them with another large grin. He tells them that today's hunt went well, all the wolves will be fed and happy tonight. He bends down and picks them up with ease, making loud roaring noises as if he were a wild beast. They laugh giggle, and pound his back and kick their small legs.

I think of InuYasha again, how he would have acted if he were the father of my babies. I feel guilty once more about my one sided love, and tend to Koga's dinner….

**THE END**

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